Quality of Life

2015Nov19LabRatWithFlaskRecently I had a heart attack. There was no sudden pain. Instead I felt very hot, and had difficulty breathing. The day was temperate. I was also very thirsty. I begged Betty to lower the air conditioner and for more and more water. But even though I was drinking a lot of liquid there was nothing coming out! Soon I found myself in an ambulance heading to the nearest hospital thanks to Betty calling 911. On the way I passed out and went into a coma that lasted about one week.

During the time I was “unconscious” I was actually in a very strange purgatory. A world filled with streamers of electric neon lights. Somehow I still had a sense of time. Eventually after a day I noticed that the patterns started to repeat. It was very much like Groundhog’s Day but without any people. At first I counted the minutes, hours and days. Then the months, and finally the years. During this time I contemplated that I had indeed died and this was in an afterlife. Perhaps even hell. One day I found a break in the daily pattern and I followed it to a place that allowed me to escape and wake up.

My first sight was Betty. Her eyes began streaming tears. She had been by my side all that time. But only a week had passed and not the multitude of years I had experienced. Her eyes welled with tears and people were mumbling “Miracle!”.

But the life I had known was gone. I was in a hospital and had a bed sore in my rear end. It felt like trying to balance my butt on a narrow and very hard metal rail. Also I could not speak. There were IV’s in my veins, tubes in my nose and throat. I’d been given numerous drugs to drain me of excess fluids and to replace the missing vitamins, minerals and other components of daily sustenance in a balance of protein, fat and carbohydrate as recommended by the AMA (American Medical Association) or maybe the FDA (Food and Drug Associations). However I was very much bedridden and even unable to turn over on my own.

I am a shy person. However here I was in a hospital with nothing to wear but a flimsy gown that did little to hide my body from view. I was a lab rat. Every hour or two a doctor or a nurse or a group of same would stop by to take blood or otherwise bother me. I kept begging them to allow me to sleep but to no avail.

Worse I had been off any form of drug and medicine for over 35 years. Now I was loopy; confused and found my memory was spotty. Additionally I was having a recurring form of déjà vu in that I kept noticing that events in time were repeating every 5 to 10 minutes. They would persist until the pattern was broken.

Before I finish I remind everyone reading this to treat it as fiction. I am not interested so much in how truthful my statements are as I am in giving you my interpretation of how I perceive my own life. I do not believe that even if I tried to, would I be able to tell of the events that everyone could agree to.

In summary I am only just recovering from all the side effects of being stricken which includes a more damaged short term memory as well as a hacked life.